Muchness

This image has been floating around the internet for a few days (weeks, months, who knows?) and when I saw it for the first time.
This image struck me.It felt like I’d run, 60 mph, straight into a brick wall. POW! Right in the kisser. Bloody face and missing teeth.It felt like I’d been hit by a bag full of every feeling of self loathing I’d ever experienced.
And here it was; embodied in a single photo.

Here is an image of one of the most vulnerable individuals imaginable.
Here is a little girl.
A little girl who will grow up on a society where her words and thoughts are rarely valued and frequently contorted.
A little girl who is taught that her sex/gender/sexuality/body/reproductive organs/what have you make her dirty; something that she should be ashamed of. 
A little girl who will grow up with nearly impossible societal standards of what kind of person she should be, what she should look like, and how she should present herself in certain company.
A little girl who will grow up in a society designed to make her feel as inadequate as possible in order to further corporate growth.
A little girl who will grow up and spend her life comparing herself to every person she sees, every celebrity on the front of a magazine, every person she sees on the internet…. every person she deems better than the person she is.
A little girl who will always question her self-worth based on the opinions of others and take to heart every mean-spirited thing that she hears and sees, while completely undervaluing every compliment and remark of admiration because she feels undeserving.
Here is a little girl,in just her underwear,trying to make herself the idea of what society has told her beautiful.
Vulnerability.
Here is a little girl trying to cut her beautiful self to change into something she deems more beautiful and more worthy, something she has been taught that society has been deemed more beautiful and valuable.
This is a little girl who hates what she is, and may not even know why.A little girl who knows no better than to underestimate how wonderful she is because she is not that, in that picture.
Here is a little girl
and this little girl is me.
This little girl can, has and will be all girls, all women (and yes even men).

This image is powerful.
This image has resurfaced every feeling of neglect, inadequacy, and self-loathing I have ever felt for myself.
Every day is a struggle. Today is a struggle. Tomorrow will be a struggle too.

All I ask is that you please remember that you are worth it.

This image has been floating around the internet for a few days (weeks, months, who knows?) and when I saw it for the first time.

This image struck me.
It felt like I’d run, 60 mph, straight into a brick wall.
POW! Right in the kisser.
Bloody face and missing teeth.
It felt like I’d been hit by a bag full of every feeling of self loathing I’d ever experienced.

And here it was; embodied in a single photo.

Here is an image of one of the most vulnerable individuals imaginable.

Here is a little girl.

A little girl who will grow up on a society where her words and thoughts are rarely valued and frequently contorted.

A little girl who is taught that her sex/gender/sexuality/body/reproductive organs/what have you make her dirty; something that she should be ashamed of. 

A little girl who will grow up with nearly impossible societal standards of what kind of person she should be, what she should look like, and how she should present herself in certain company.

A little girl who will grow up in a society designed to make her feel as inadequate as possible in order to further corporate growth.

A little girl who will grow up and spend her life comparing herself to every person she sees, every celebrity on the front of a magazine, every person she sees on the internet…. every person she deems better than the person she is.

A little girl who will always question her self-worth based on the opinions of others and take to heart every mean-spirited thing that she hears and sees, while completely undervaluing every compliment and remark of admiration because she feels undeserving.

Here is a little girl,
in just her underwear,
trying to make herself the idea of what society has told her beautiful.

Vulnerability.

Here is a little girl trying to cut her beautiful self to change into something she deems more beautiful and more worthy, something she has been taught that society has been deemed more beautiful and valuable.

This is a little girl who hates what she is, and may not even know why.
A little girl who knows no better than to underestimate how wonderful she is because she is not that, in that picture.

Here is a little girl

and this little girl is me.

This little girl can, has and will be all girls, all women (and yes even men).

This image is powerful.

This image has resurfaced every feeling of neglect, inadequacy, and self-loathing I have ever felt for myself.

Every day is a struggle.
Today is a struggle.
Tomorrow will be a struggle too.

All I ask is that you please remember that you are worth it.

Fat Talk

http://www.godvine.com/At-First-These-Women-Were-So-Offended-Then-They-Realized-It-Was-Their-Own-Fault—4434.html

I stumbled onto this while on Facebook and I feel like it makes a very valid, interesting and almost simple point. 

Sometimes, we can be more damaging to ourselves than others.

I spent a whole week working, going to the gym, and eating right. When I got to the gym this morning, with it’s endlessly mirrored walls, all I could do was watch myself exercise and hate the way my body looked in motion, or while sedentary, or even between standing and sitting. I was taking the steps to change what I want to change about myself all week, and doing a decent job of it, and at the end of it, I could only look at myself in disgust and think horrible things.

^ This right here is an example.

You live your life day to day and do what it is you need to do to not only survive, but hopefully also to make yourself happy and fulfilled.

We, as a society (NOT JUST WOMEN, EVERYBODY), need to start thinking about what it is we’re saying and thinking about ourselves and realizing that those ideas are toxic. Thinking those things will not help us feel fulfilled; Saying those things will not help us reach our goals. The only thing that thoughts and ideas like that will do is keep us down, hinder us, and try to break us.

It’s unrealistic to assume that we can suddenly stop feeling negativity towards our bodies, but the best advice I can give is to embrace it. Embrace your wobbly bits, your too big nose, your not so straight teeth, your too big or too small breasts, penis, ears, etc; embrace what ever it is you don’t like about yourself.

Fat shaming and body shaming are not acceptable, so why do you hold a double-standard for yourself? It’s time to start loving who we are.

Holiday Gym Specials and the Bullshit They Spew

So I feel like this is something that needs to be said. Not just because I feel that other people need to hear it, but I need to hear see it.

Beginning somewhere around Thanksgiving (in the US anyway - so… end of November) people start loosening their year long grip on “Oh no, I don’t eat carbs” and “I really shouldn’t” or my personal favorite “I’ve got to keep up my figure”. I appreciate the sentiment and I understand that if those are things you WANT to do, then by all means. I appreciate the lengths that you are taking to make the changes to your body that you want because YOU want them.

It’s time for Wintermas, Festivus, etc. It’s the time of various religiously based holidays that most loosely follow for the sake of gifts (i.e. I’m agnostic and I celebrate Christmas for the sake of Love Actually, food, and decorating the tree).

Since the obvious reason for the season (surely not axial tilt?) is to capitalize on psychological state of the masses after all the judgmental looks from their mother-in-law(s), I’ve been noticing that the extremely uncomfortable gym ads are starting to surface early.

Starting about 2 weeks ago, a local gym ad showed up on a billboard (whose original residence took place outside of the bakery I work for, but has since been moved) “Here come the Holidays, but don’t worry we’re here to help!” Let’s start with that! Help? Help with what? My mental state? The fact that I need more traction on my tires? The fact that I have no money to pay my bills, let alone pay for presents? Oh wait…… no! You mean my newly formed and sadly unappreciated love-handles? Or the fact that my empty wallet isn’t light enough?

Now let’s talk about the ad at the gym I have the misfortune of having a membership to. It was an advertisement with some “THIS HOLIDAY SEASON ONLY, Coerce your friends to come to our crappy gym and get a free personal training day, so a ‘professional’ can judge you” deal on it. At the bottom of the ad, shows (what I assume to be) a woman’s feet on a scale and the screen doesn’t show numbers. No. Nope. No no no. It says, “HELP”.

There are so many things wrong with that ad - First - that’s just rude. Don’t make people bring their friends to this shithole, so they can get a free day of judgment (not help) - hardly worth the effort.

Secondly, its really frustrating that this ad, along with most of their other ads ONLY involve women. I’ve been a member for 6 months and every ad I’ve ever seen has exclusively contained women. I recognize that they do provide a weight machine section exclusively for women, but their entire customer base is not made up of women. I don’t appreciate that this gym is either capitalizing off attractive women OR that it’s trying to target women specifically into feeling shameful about their weight. This Christmas ad speaks for itself. There is not a male version or an androgynous version, only a specifically female version. This speaks lengths to what the objectives of the ad are. “Women - you are not allowed to indulge or enjoy things to the point that it makes you gain weight - you should probably bring your christmas ass up here so you can fit into that dress for the work Christmas party.” or “Your value as a woman and human being is based on your appearance. You need our help to make sure that you are still valuable to society.”

Lastly (for now anyways), I find it extremely aggravating that gyms, like this one, capitalize on the frailty of self-esteem. What is wrong with putting on 5, 10, 15+ lbs between October and March (or you know, any time really)? Why is that a bad thing? Why is that being demonized? We naturally feel the need to consume more and become more sedentary during the winter because it’s cold… and that’s what basically every living creature does when it’s cold out for long periods of time. Why are people the exception? It is a ridiculous standard. Fuck the fitness industry for attempting to belittle the masses who are already wounded on an everyday basis by the unrealistic standards of beauty that Photoshop and society have helped create. Shame on you for imposing the belief that we should be ashamed of how are bodies look and function. I can’t even stand in line at the grocery store without feeling hideous, I certainly don’t need to be fat-shamed by EVERY OTHER ASPECT OF MY LIFE.

So after all the long, but totally necessary, ranting, the point I’m trying to reach is that throughout your life, and especially during the holidays, remember that you are just fine the way you are whether you are 80lbs of 8000lbs (unrealistic, but you get the idea), Your value is NOT measured by your weight or appearance. You are allowed to gain, lose, and maintain weight as you like. Happily go to the gym every day, or watch what you eat if that’s what you want, but also remember you are just as welcome to stuff the entire gingerbread house you just finished building into your mouth (btw that is what I’ve been doing with doughnuts).

Don’t let pushy bullshit ads dominate how you celebrate your preferred holiday. Don’t let judgmental looks and snide quips about how your stomach looks in that sweater determine the way you feel this Wintermas. Eat what you want, exercise (or don’t) when you want. Please enjoy the holidays and remember that this is a time for celebration and love; That includes self-love. 

Most of all, I wish everyone a very happy, unspecified holiday of their choice. I hope you all remember to put as much energy towards loving and caring for yourselves as you do for others.

A quick note

About 3 months ago, I started a job at a local bakery. All I can say is OH MY GOD IT IS KICKING MY ASS IN THE NICEST WAY.

I am developing the forearm muscles of a 15 year old boy who just discovered the internet.

More to come. (hah)

K my computer is back in commission and I’m ready to start posting ALL THE THINGS again. Time to post some srs things about feminism, weight, body image, self love, pro choice, body positivity and all the fun things in between.

K my computer is back in commission and I’m ready to start posting ALL THE THINGS again. Time to post some srs things about feminism, weight, body image, self love, pro choice, body positivity and all the fun things in between.

thefrogman:

There are people who are convinced that shame and guilt are effective ways to motivate someone to address their weight issues. A recent study has indicated that this method can actually make things much worse.

When a person with overeating issues gets depressed, food is often what they use to seek comfort. You are not helping. You are not being supportive. You are not giving us “tough love.” You are triggering our depression and causing us to eat even more.

Please stop making us eat your words. They are very… fattening. 

Artwork by Sarah Johnson [website | tumblr | twitter]

First off - let me start out with apologizing for the stupid amount of profanity happening in this post. You’ve been warned.

Secondly-

There is nothing wrong with being overweight, but there IS something wrong with policing someone’s body and tearing them down. There IS something wrong with hurting people.

Its not like I, or any other overweight person, can’t tell that we’re overweight, It is none of YOUR business. I don’t need you to make me feel bad about the body I occupy. Many of overweight individuals are unhappy, not all, but a lot of them. Many suffer from weight issues (gain or loss or even plateauing), image issues, eating disorders, etc, Don’t make it worse by interjecting your unnecessary and hurtful opinion.

Have you put on weight? WHO KNOWS? ITS NONE OF YOUR FUCKING BUSINESS.

No one will want to date you if you’re fat. NO - NO ONE LIKE YOU WILL WANT TO DATE ME IF I’M FAT. THAT IS JUST FINE - YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY A PIECE OF SHIT.

You should watch your weight. That’s unhealthy! YOU KNOW WHAT ELSE IS UNHEALTHY? YOUR ATTITUDE.

No wonder you’re sick. Look how fat you are! OR MAYBE ITS BECAUSE I’M ALIVE AND THAT TENDS TO HAPPEN TO LIVING THINGS. MAYBE ITS BECAUSE I WAS HANGING OUT WITH YOUR SICK ASS LAST WEEK.

Have you tried Diet and Exercise? YES HAVE YOU TRIED NOT BEING A PUSHY, KNOW-IT-ALL ASSHOLE. THANKS, CAPTAIN FUCKING OBVIOUS. CLEARLY MY IDEA OF EXERCISE IS SWIMMING IN A VAT OF LARD. I’M SO GLAD YOU OPENED MY EYES (dumbass)

You’ll get no sympathy from me, its your fault you got fat. ACTUALLY NO - THERE ARE A NUMBER OF FACTORS IN MY WEIGHT GAIN. ONE THING IS CERTAIN. YOU AND YOUR SHITTY ATTITUDE FUELED MY DEPRESSION AND MY EMOTIONAL EATING. THANKS ASSHOLE.

Your shitty attitude about MY body is not going to help ME in my own emotional and physical journey to learn to love myself. It will hinder me. It will push me back. That attitude towards overweight people is disgusting. Get off that high-horse you put yourself on and butt out of things you have never experienced. You say you were fat once? Cool. That’s awesome you lost your weight and are happy with yourself. But don’t tell me how to lose weight. I’ve been struggling like this my whole life - do not tell me its easy, because it was easy for you. Do not tell me its only based on eating habits or laziness, just because that’s what it was for you. 

EVERYONE is different. EVERYONE has their own struggles. Do not assume that you know everything about me and my struggles.

You may be projecting your own unhappiness with your life on me (or something along those lines) OR you may just be an asshole. Who knows? Not me. But seriously. Cut that shit out. It’s not funny. It’s not cute. Stahp.

(via tastyhumanburgers)

thebodyisnotanapology:

Fat and Visible by Rachel Seiderman, Content Intern

(Closed captions available on video.)

Jennifer Livingston, a fat Wisconsin news anchor, received an email from a viewer “concerned” about the example she sets for community members, especially young girls. In her response, Ms. Livingston addresses not only this particular viewer’s cruel words but bullying in general, using her experience as a springboard into a larger conversation. As you watch, think about the weight policing that women in the public eye often experience, and keep in mind that the man who wrote the email probably didn’t think that he was doing anything wrong. He was just expressing his concern for Ms. Livingston’s health and her ability to influence young girls’ health and weight decisions, right?

(We’ll save the full discussion for another day, but in fact what that viewer was doing was concern trolling. If you’re interested right now, Fat Heffalump wrote an amazing piece about the difference between genuine concern and concern trolling.)

That’s not to say that Ms. Livingston’s response doesn’t have some problems of its own. She’s clearly uncomfortable calling herself fat, the term that most people in the fat acceptance movement would use. Fat activists tend to avoid the “o” words—overweight and obese—because they pathologize people whose weights fall above arbitrary limits and lead to the conflation of weight and health. (Again, more on this later in the week.) In addition to that, she speaks directly to children who are “struggling with their weight,” reinforcing the assumption that there’s something inherently wrong about being fat, especially young and fat.